The helper

I think. I plan. I organise. And yes, I help where I can.

But today, I was told to be cautious of the way I go about doing things. Because I might be doing things that I do not necessarily have to do. And it ["it" being the things that I constantly put my hand up for] might end up becoming something that is expected of me by others.

Like an "oh, that's alright. Monica will do it" type of situation.

I honestly do not have any issues with helping. I am cool with going the extra mile. Taking the initiative. Firing up the plans. Covering all bases. But I understand and do see the predicament that lies behind my exuberance in helping others.

That I might be taken for granted. Taken advantage of. Stepped on. All over.

There is a part of me that acknowledges the conundrum but another part of me [a bigger part] that says no. No, I have a huge amount of trust and belief in those around me. I would not do something that displeases me and I have an intrinsic reason for everything I do [tis but a given].

Whilst saying that, I am appreciative of the advice [amongst many others]. One that looks out for me and makes sure that I am not throwing myself out there for people to use [or misuse].

I admit, when given a spoonful of thoughts, I generally pour it out into an ocean of self-analysis and reflection which can be quite disheartening and troubling at times. Troubling because it impedes on the things that I am so used to doing but now have to question.

It is in taking a step back, in stepping away from the routine of naturally taking things on, that causes me much discomfort. On the positive, it might help off load some things from my long want-to-do list.

By golly, what does a girl have to do around here to find a perfect balance in life?

Here's to helping.