Chapter 1

This morning, I will be thankful for all that I have. There is a part of me that wants to beat myself up silly but I will learn today to go easy on myself. To allow myself to grow and take on life's unexpected turns with understanding and compassion.

Just minutes before midnight yesterday, I was seated in a pew between my brother and my boyfriend. Next to my brother was my boyfriend's sister and mum.

Now take a slow walk down memory lane...

In 2002, I moved to East Malaysia for my studies and found myself sitting on my own in church for the first time. It was in my quiet reflection that I realised how I have always had at least five of my other siblings and my parents with me.

And one day I cried. I cried so much that it was enough to last for the many years to come that I would be on my own.

I built a wall of strength around myself. One that would hold me up each time I felt like I did not belong. Each time I found myself in a new situation with no experience or knowledge of what to do.

I learned to be independent.