Clear as day

As thoughts roam wildly in my head, one thing I know is for certain. These are hard times that we are facing.

Since coming back from my holidays, I have come to realise my age. And the responsibilities that are inevitably connected with it. 

There is a part of me that looks back in yearning silence. Yet, I know the journey that lies ahead of me, though challenging, is one that needs to be taken in order to grow. 

I wake up in fear some days. An illogical fear of the unknown.

If I can take two steps back...

Mediocre. 

In the bigger scheme of things, my qualms and worries can be calmly alleviated. I just need time. Time to be resolute. And to reflect.

A sense of belonging is important to me. Even if it is with just one person. I am thankful that I have, what I call, a true friend at work. Someone who does not mask her personality in the face of a detached and clinical environment. 

And... I know that he will always be there for me.

There are a lot of lifestyle changes that one makes when he or she gets into a relationship. Be it a reduced number of social calls. A decision to spend more time in each other's company.

Or even a sacrifice that you would make in a heartbeat [or there lackof].

I love him more than ever. And I do not think that I could love him any less.

Believe you me that there were times when I found myself in the most bizarre of places wondering what it was that I should have done to remedy what I had done. I wish they taught us how to love. What to say. What to do. What not to do. What to expect.

But I know... love is quite unexplainable and unpredictable. Only to be experienced first hand.

Well then, they should have taught us how to service a car. Paint over a chipped wall. Offered self-help classes. Catered for different learning capabilities. Advised us on more career options.

Perhaps it is time we revisit the education system...

Here's to normality as it stands.